"to move forward"

"the people who successfully negotiate their lives in the aftermath of trauma tend to follow well-worn pathways. Those paths run parallel to the two central ideas I’ve been developing. The first is: Want it, need it, have it. You have to desire something and engage in some activity to get it. You can’t give up. You can’t give in. This, of course, means that you get busy and get organized. The second idea is: See one, do one, teach one, which tells us how to go about achieving the first idea. Here, then, are 12 strategies that you can employ to move forward.
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1. WANT IT, NEED IT, HAVE IT. Devote yourself passionately to an art, a craft, a musical instrument, a language, a horse, or your own education.
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This step also helps you develop an internal locus of control, which reinforces the idea that you have some influence over your life...
2. BE HERE NOW. This is the strategy of mindfulness
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The brain has evolved to give us mental models and behavioral scripts that allow us to function on autopilot. And in these times of always-on electronic communication, that tendency is exaggerated. Be here now means: Be quiet. Take time every day to tune out all the electronic noise, the chattering voices that clamor for attention, and then listen to your own mind and body. Tune in to The Stream. Putting in this effort to pay attention means that you’ll be much more likely to seize opportunities and avoid hazards. You may find an intuition, a gut feeling, a sixth sense that saves your life.
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3. BE PATIENT. Everything takes eight times as long as it’s supposed to.
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4. BE TOUGH. Learn to suffer well. Richard Tedeschi, a psychologist who treats post-traumatic stress, said that “to achieve the greatest psychological health, some kind of suffering is necessary.” ... In a world where some suffering is inevitable, the only sensible thing is to learn how to deal with it.
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5. GET THE SMALL PICTURE. People who suffer do not have to suffer all the time.
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6. PUT THINGS IN THEIR PLACE. Traumatic memories don’t go away. Rituals are one way of controlling when and how you experience them. If the memories are encapsulated in a ritual time and place, they are less able to torment you the rest of the time.
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7. WORK, WORK, WORK. As Richard Mollica said, staying busy is the most effective means of adaptation after trauma.
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So don’t sit around brooding on whatever’s eating you.
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8. SEE ONE, DO ONE, TEACH ONE.
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9. TOUCH SOMEONE. Staying socially connected is one of the most important and effective adaptations. This means staying close to family and friends and making a decision to be with people who have the right attitudes. Abundant research shows that people who are socially connected are healthier and live longer.
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10. BE GRATEFUL. Whatever the survival event was, you’re here to deal with it. Maybe, as with a crippling injury, there is no end to that event. No matter how crazy your life seems at the moment, being alive is cause for celebration, for only the living can celebrate. And most people can find much more to enjoy than breathing in and breathing out. Above all, avoid self-pity. [Moi ici: Isto faz-me lembrar as empresas preocupadas porque não vão atingir os objectivos que em Dezembro de 2019 definiram para o ano de 2020. A minha resposta foi, o objectivo para 2020 é chegar ao fim vivo]
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11. WALK THE WALK. Act as if you’re better. Find small things that you can do that give you a sense of being normal. ... “Even on days when I lacked self-confidence, I chose to put on a smile. I acted strong when I didn’t feel strong—and before long, I was strong!
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12. LIFE IS DEEP; SHALLOW UP. Humor is essential, quieting the amygdala and reducing stress. Laugh at the world. Laugh at yourself. Having a strong circle of friends and family helps with this."

Trechos retirados de “Surviving Survival: The Art and Science of Resilience” de Laurence Gonzales